Saturday, August 30, 2008
nth much these few days... mainly sch and tests...
eoy comin le =.=... gonna screw it sianz
lol... i realli duno wad i doin this year sia...
kk nvm XD
wad I truly meant was tt... I had noone from the start... and tts why I really think nth matters now... at least at this point in time...
however much I noe tt deep down it would be good to be recgonised... but I nvr ever once requested for it...and hav nvr once thought of how to get it...
we live in 2 diff worlds... tts why sometimes I too dun understand wad ur tryin to say...
but both of us noe too... its not tt simple...
mayb I haven been concerned be4... mayb its been ages I hav heard wad I heard... mayb I hav already forgotten wad this kinda feelin this is supposed to be... mayb its wrong to do so...
but I noe... I hav a bunch of weaknesses... much more than any normal human beings shld hav... and I noe... I haven made any exception to anyone yet...
I dunno when will it be the time... but I guess it wun be anytime soon...
emptiness;
Friday, July 04, 2008
physics test on wed... maths test on fri... both ended...
physics was... ok... shld be getting a B...
sian... drop from A1 to A2 now to a B...
maths... as usual... diff like shit...
shld be getting 2x/40 ba...
wtf la... sec 3 haven get 3x/40 in 1 test be4...
had ironman on thurs 3-7pm...
lol team 7 emerged 2nd!
dam tyco =.=
team 7 is naruto-sakura-sasuke team XD
anyway there were 4 tasks...
1st task... listening to music
and writing down their lyrics...
1 min interval between each song...
song played 3 times...
ending time of 3 mins...
oh yea the song was dying by five for fighting... the song some parts dam blur de lo =.=
think my team got 2nd for this task...
wasnt the main contributer...
actually i wasnt the main contributer for all 4 task la lol
2nd task...
we hav 2 chairs and water...
we are supposed to transport 600ml of water
through a distance of 15m
we cant touch the course of the 15m...
and can onli use the chairs to do it...
lol and expected... when someone found the fastest way to do it...
everyone folos...
we completed it with 7 rounds...
2nd or 3rd i think...
3rd task...
some ques will be asked and then teams would hav to run to a bell
to give the ans
correct ans plus 3 points
wrong ans minus 1
the points would be used to buy materials for the nex task
some ques i noe ans la...
but sometimes need think... then cannot run lol...
zz realli wasted 1 question...
the question was:
Who was the main character of the anime Bleach?
wtf la... shld hav gotten it... dam waste...
4th task...
the egg thing... drop from high place...
shant elaborate...
then no more le... in the end
got 2nd for this inter-sec3 competition
wondering how much ace i would get... XD
youth day... proj day... competition all nex week...
sianz...
been having alot of probs this week...
both physically and mentally...
plus the 2 tests... stressed out...
worst thing is... i hav noone to talk to...
not a single person can come into my mind
when i wanna tell someone of the prob im facing...
sian... wonder when the pain will end...
hai...
post count 59
4838 words and counting...
emptiness;
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
found some personality test on sl's blog... tried it out and i post here lol
Your view on yourself:
You are intelligent, honest and sweet. You are friendly to everybody and don't like conflict. Because you're so cheerful and fun people are naturally attracted to you and like to talk to you.
The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You like serious, smart and determined people. You don't judge a book by its cover, so good-looking people aren't necessarily your style. This makes you an attractive person in many people's eyes.
Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You prefer to get to know a person very well before deciding whether you will commit to the relationship.
The seriousness of your love:
Your have very sensible tactics when approaching the opposite sex. In many ways people find your straightforwardness attractive, so you will find yourself with plenty of dates.
Your views on education
Education is less important than the real world out there, away from the classroom. Deep inside you want to start working, earning money and living on your own.
The right job for you:
You have plenty of dream jobs but have little chance of doing any of them if you don't focus on something in particular. You need to choose something and go for it to be happy and achieve success.
How do you view success:
Success in your career is not the most important thing in life. You are content with what you have and think that being with someone you love is more than spending all of your precious time just working.
What are you most afraid of:
You are concerned about your image and the way others see you. This means that you try very hard to be accepted by other people. It's time for you to believe in who you are, not what you wear.
Who is your true self:
You like privacy very much because you enjoy spending time with your own thoughts. You like to disappear when you cannot find solutions to your own problems, but you would feel better if you learned to share your thoughts with a person you trust.
Comments:
points 3, 5, 7, 8, 9 shld be correct ba... others mayb...
emptiness;
Wednesday, March 12, 2008
2nd blog for the day...
tt was the brief side of what i have been doin...
now for the reflection side i have...
i begun to think how people can be so childish and ignorant...
i know all i have are weaknesses...
i know that i do not have ANY strengths at all
i know that i am born to be... someone who is either average,
or below average at everything and anything i do...
i know that i'm juz some noob guy...
im tired of trying...
tired of keeping everything to myself
tired of not being able to speak my mind in front of people
tired of thinking bout what people would think if i do this or if i do that
tired of tolerating what people can do or say
i wan to speak my mind... tell the truth...
but... the truth is always ugly to the ears...
when will we ever be able to mature
what is maturity
why cant things be definite and not so abstract
what is too much and what is too little
what is overboard and what is juz right
why do people laugh at things when things arent funny
why muz we always be lead by the one who is able to express himself more freely,
looks at things more freely, or have the courage to do things that might be wrong or right.
and how do we make ourself become like that
why muz we follow a trend... and not make the trend ourself
what's the point of living...
when life is so cold
and the society is even more colder
and we will all die in the end
why isit that i onli can say this behind this thing called a blog?
i know the answer... and that is that there is no other way or means
other than a computer... to say what i have to say...
even behind a computer...
what i say is limited
because of a reason
and that is people can read this blog.
and it is also for this reason im saying these things...
because i wan people to read
everything single thing has pros and cons...
mayb... cept for myself... where i onli hav cons...
am i wrong...? to think that most teens nowadays thinks much more
than what adults thinks what we are thinking?
to tell the truth... i nvr had an ambition...
until this year...
where i wanted to be a psychologist treating teens
i based this on myself...
because i dun want other people to follow my steps
and be so restricted in expressing myself
today in the china philosophy lesson...
the teacher said that the most diff thing to do is something called "ren"
which means tolerate...
this is because when a person tolerates so much...
he will one day... explode...
tolerating is easy... but the effects of tolerating too much...
is difficult.
think... is a powerful tool in every human being
that is what makes us different from other animals...
and the result of thinking alot... is all these things i wrote
and why do i think alot... is because of the time i spent alone...
thinking bout all the stuff that has happened around me...
i yearn for the feeling of warmth...
but i noe that...
with all these opinions in my head...
the chance of it happening is... 0.1%
unless someone is able to change these opinions bout me...
someone who has more patience than me...
will that happen...
written with a brush of frustration and anger.
PS: looked at my wishlist accidentally... and felt that it was a pun... i intended to write that i was still thinking bout what i wished... but in the end... i really felt that it meant i wished for thinking... lol...
emptiness;
yay here to blog again...
the first to reach the cable car stop-pit (some i think when on to the highest point)
i won the cable car lol XD (waiting time included)
and not onli on the way up i won... on the way down i also won LOL
bought 2 shirts... 1 for S$3 and another for S$2...
las sat went Beijing Zoo...
and the there de english very pro... nocturnal animals become "Travel By Night The Animal Theater" lol... then the small animals (pets) zone become micro-organisms park or something liddat...
cannot blame them la... chinese country...
this week is immersion in some sec1-sec3 school... i in sec2 class... all talk in chi de... so diff understand =.=
the 3rd week here le... bout 41 more days...
emptiness;
Thursday, February 28, 2008
its been 3-4 days in Bei Jing liao...
shld be quite adapted to the weather here already...
regarding why i am able to blog...
all the blogs maked by xanga,wordpress and blogger are all not able to load
however, www.blogger.com isnt being banned
thus, making it possible for me to type here.
can continue tag if ur want or if anybody sees this...
will be looking for tags in my cbox account...
and reply tags here...
yep.... the weather has been at the extremes lately... cold outside and hot inside...
juz seeing how long i can last in this types of weather...
lessons here... not much lessons for the 1st week actually...
english: doing things bout the types of political philosophies i think...
chem: revising bout preparation of salts and 3 ace proj to do.... can get 10 ace from tt de XD
IHC: miss esther cheong teaching... and i seriously think that mrs nancy tay's and miss esther cheong's teaching style is quite similar... talking bout singapore's nationalism
maths: trigo ratio... sin cos tan sec cosec cotan...
1st day was nth much... arrive at beijing on 3pm...
2nd day was briefing and an outing to some museum on beijing's history...
3rd day was the actual lessons...
4th day... which is today... some beijing teacher teaching us on zhong guo li shi...
and an outing to tian dan i think...
yup... still can login msn from here... so can talk to me if u wan...
most prob is morn can login
or the night between 5-9.30
or else... its lesson time and if i reply at tt time, means im secretly using com behind the teacher XD...
post count 54
emptiness;
Sunday, February 24, 2008
this might be my last blog entry for 2 months straight...
cause according to ngp china ban blogger.com so cannot blog lol...
not gonna write alot stuff...
going tomo morn to beijing satellite campus and will onli be comin back on the 24th of april so...
mayb i will find other means to blog ba... see first
yea so... bb and wish me good luck XD
post count 53
emptiness;
Wednesday, February 13, 2008
juz read sl's blog... felt that it was quite true ba...
thus, i shall quote from his blog XD
"i hate my life
; wait, i dont hate -
cause i have no fucking life at all ."
true, no further comments
"when you take a look at me,
you might see someone emo-ing,
you might see someone ugly,
you might see someone that is plain daydreaming,
but when you look deeper into me,
there is nothing but emptiness and ugliness"
same same
"why can’t you be your TRUE self among people ?
perhaps being alone might allow you to show your true self,"
yup... i am nvr my true self amongst people... onli when im alone, or mayb behind a virtual barrier(should i call it a barrier? or a opened-door?) am i my true self...
"u feel that no one cares,
and seriously,
no one cares.
u feel that you can only face things alone,
yet you lack the ability to face things alone."
after reading this, i suddenly remember the nick i used to use in msn... it goes like this: "the truth is, no one bothers, no one thinks, no one cares" (about me obviously)... and after that it was the long (as in the period of time used) and boring nick...
these feelings indeed isnt veh easily felt, neither issit felt by many people. thus, people doesnt understand it and thinks that u have something wrong. you can try telling urself ur useless for 1000 times a day. then, you might be close.
(not related)
HAHA... kenneth just msned me... and his first sentence was,
"so you're seriously leaving on the 25th?"
and i realli laughed out loud... would it be fake? lol...
12 more days... fast eh... and gone for 60 days
need go bath liao... bb
hai... (ah... heres my msn nick... lol)
post count 52
emptiness;
